What I Think About: Counting My Memories, Er Blessings

My sister sent me a text last night saying something to the effect of, "I'm already dreading tomorrow."

Tomorrow?  Why tomorrow?  Of course I knew.  Of course it had been nagging at me and I responded to the pain the way I generally do--by ignoring it until it couldn't be ignored.

May 2.  Mom's 61st birthday.  It's here.

I got angry.  Always, I get angry.  Mad she turned 60 and died.  Mad 60 was a waste.  Mad I won't see her blow out those 61 candles.  Mad I don't freaking have a mom.  Mad! But if counseling has taught me anything, then it has taught me anger is a surface feeling--a feeling that keeps us from feeling other feelings.

I stood in the shower long and hot and pondered what do I really feel?  Under the hurt and anger--what do I feel?  I feel ashamed for wasting time with her--for not saying "I love you" enough.  I feel disappointed my children will never know her how I knew her.  I feel scared I'll die of the same disease.  I feel a profound sense of orphaness.

These last few months I just haven't been the same.  I've been bogged down in the bad.  Letting her death and my dad's cancer, and the every day grind eat away at my joy and hope.  I see other daughters complaining about their mothers and I want to grab their shoulders and scream at them to just shut up and love their moms because one day--despite the over-sharing of advice and the giving grandkids too much candy and toys, and the petty fights over whose house they'll go to for Christmas--their moms will be gone and they will wish deep in their soul for just one more moment.

Now I'm not going to go all motivational speaker on you.  I'm not going to tell you to live in the moment and seize the day and make it all count.  I'm not.  And if I did, you wouldn't listen anyway because life--poopy diapers, whopping piles of laundry, runny noses, and chores--gets in the way of enjoying life.

But what I am going to do--for my sake and not yours--is to remember on these bad days what made the good days so damn good.  I read 1000 Gifts by Ann Voskamp (and if you haven't then I really think you should) and she talks about how all Biblical miracles were preceded by thanks, by gratitude, by the naming of blessing.  So today, I'm not going to wish I had seized the day.  I'm not going to wallow in "what I could have done" or "should have done."  I'm going to get out of my pity-party by naming 61 memories of my mom.  Memories are, perhaps, the sweetest blessings.

In no particular order:

1. One time at the grocery store I snuck an economy sized jar of grape jelly into the grocery cart.  When we got home, my mom told me that jelly was all I would eat on sandwiches until it was gone.  To this day, I hate grape jelly.
2. My mom called me one time on December 23 to tell me about this sweater Matt just had to have. The store was sold out so she, over the dissent of the store clerks, stripped the mannequin of the display sweater and demanded it be sold to her.  I don't even know if Matt still has that sweater.
3. My mom and I painted ironing-board sized Santas together.  
4. My mom called my cat Nanners.
5. She loved Cherry Garcia ice cream (I think I'll have some today--in celebration of her).
6. She owned a Subway and would make Cheez-Wiz sandwiches.
7. She never did learn the lyrics to The Grundy County Auction (hey pretty lady won't you give me a sign I do anything to make you mine) despite attempts to teach her.
8. When I was a kid, she'd give me 50 cents to go to 7-11 to get a slurpee.
9. My mom took me to get my black lab, Cubby.
10. Once my mom took me swimming at the YMCA.  All of a sudden she pulled me out of the water and we sped home.  I was mad we had to leave. Turns out, there was a tornado spotted about 3 blocks away.
11. She had expensive taste in jewelry. I'm certain this is genetic.
12. She spent her summers on a farm in Trehern, Manitoba.
13. She became a U.S. citizen on August 22, 2010.  She moved to the states in 1969.
14. My mom taught me about percentages by taking me shopping and out to eat.  To this day, no one can figure out a tip faster than I can.
15. She made the best corn bread.
16. She loved pigs.
17. My mom named me after her best friend, Heather Joy.
18. Although she generally followed rules, she loved to speed.  She never got a ticket.
19. I get my cleaning OCD tendencies from her.
20. When I was in junior high, my mom would paint my fingernails with amazing designs.  My fave was the time she painted my nails to look like tuxedos.
21. I wore her senior prom dress to my junior prom because class never goes out of style.
22. Her face when I tried on wedding dresses.
23. Her face when she saw me in THE wedding dress.
24. Those 15 minute lectures that lasted an hour.
25. I used to love jamming to Karma Chameleon with her.
26. In 2002 I got heat stroke and stayed in bed for days.  She read Anne of Green Gables to me.
27. Her smile.
28. The deep, throaty "oooooo" sound she made when she scratched animals on their chin.
29. No one will make chicken marsala the way she did.
30. The woman was terrified of spiders---but I got her to hold a tarantula and smile.
31. Going on the roller coaster on New York New York in Vegas.
32. Giggling at my dad as he danced to rap music on a pirate cruise in CanCun.
33. Feeding the ducks at Disneyland.
34. The time she caught me trying to light a cigarette butt.
35. The fights we had about not being a pack-rat (I outgrew this phase).
36. The way she used to brush "Kitty" for hours.
37. Whenever my checkbook was off, I knew she could find the error and fix it.
38. She loved to go to Baskin Robbins where she'd get a scoop of Jamocha Almond Fudge and a scoop of Kaluha and Cream (and when that flavor was gone, Pralines and Cream).  
39. Once it took her an hour--literally--to eat 2 scoops of ice cream.
40. It was awkward but she went with me to buy my wedding night and honeymoon boudoir. 
41. When I got back from my honeymoon, she asked if the sex went well.  Again, awkward!
42. She never could figure out how to cut and paste and I used to get so frustrated trying to teach her.  But hey, my father in law isn't sure you are supposed to type in the address bar so I guess she was more advanced then I give her credit for.
43. She could remember the sandwich orders of at least 50 regular customers.  
44. Although she was a business owner, her businesses all included service. She treated her customers with kindness and respect even when they treated her with condescension and disdain.
45. There was never a chocolate the woman didn't like.  Especially if it was a Reisen.
46. I used to freak her out by rubbing velvet on her.  The feel of velvet gave her the heebie jeebies. I still don't get it.
47. She did not like heights.
48. Even though she pretended to think it was inappropriate trash, secretly my mom loved 90210 and Melrose Place.
49. My mom forced me to cut my hair when she didn't think I was taking good care of it.  I don't have the right face for a pixie cut.  My bone structure is all wrong.  I've forgiven her.
50. My mom tried to convince my sister to name her child Eaton Klindt.  She never got why this was both totally inappropriate and hilarious.
51. She bought a Volvo XC90 because I told her they were awesome.  I was right.
52. When I got my first period she didn't have much sympathy.  She was like, "here's a tampon, let's go."  I'm so glad she didn't let me lay around and mope about the whole thing. It's natural--why act like it's not?
53. Telling her I needed a bra was horribly embarrassing (not to mention a total lie).  
54. When I was in labor and getting wheeled back for an emergency c-section I saw her crying.  I was irritated because it was about me, not her.  But now that I'm a mom, I get it.
55. On the Christmas we insisted she go to the Mayo Clinic we had a massive family fight. The sons-in-laws and kids took refuge in the basement.  This is just the way we solved problems--loud voices, passionate debate, anger, and a plan.
56. My mom did not get gray hair.  Can I get an Amen?
57. I remember the poem I wrote telling my parents I was pregnant.  And I remember my mom calling to make sure she understood the poem correctly.
58. I love to sing in the car. I can't hold a tune.  I got both of these qualities from my mom.
59. There has never been anyone who could more effectively cover a mall with speed and accuracy and without need for food, drink, bathrooms, or a break.  To say she was a professional shopper is quite an understatement.
60. She never knew that I knew but when I had my first child, she came in to watch me "sleep."  She just stood in the doorway and watched me--the way I watch my babies.
61. My senior year my dad was traveling.  I came downstairs for breakfast.  We had chocolate cherry cake and vanilla ice cream. Best. Breakfast. Ever.

What I think is counting blessings--counting memories can't erase the pain but it can bring peace.  That in and of itself is a miracle.  Peace in the storm.  

See that comment section?  Why don't you share a memory/blessing of your mom?


Thanks, Shell for letting me Pour My Heart Out on your blog.
 

Fashion Friday: Florals

Fashion.  Friday. Florals.  That's a lot of F's.

What a perfect way to end my FML week. Yep, an F kind of week.

Whether you like it or not, florals will be big on the scene this season.  Yes, this is true of tulips popping up all over.  But it is also true of fashion.

So grab a floral top or bag or dress and embrace this feminine, "looks like a couch from the 70s" fashion.

FOR WORK

Source: 9to5chic.com via RJ on Pinterest

WITH A CARDIE

Source: ideeli.com via RJ on Pinterest

FOR A SUMMER DAY

Source: sincerelyjules.com via Arika on Pinterest

FOR YOUR FEET

Source: weheartit.com via Alyssa on Pinterest

FOR YOUR HOME

Source: 28.media.tumblr.com via Rachel on Pinterest

Although I don't recommend it, FLORAL ON FLORAL is not out of the question.

Source: stylecaster.com via Nadia on Pinterest

Things I Love: Gemma Doyle Trilogy

I'm a fan of young adult literature.  I like to tell people this is due to the fact that I teach young adults.  Really, I just like how profound and lovely young adult literature can be (without takings itself to seriously).

Think about it.  How many of the most recent literature phenomenons have been geared toward young adults?  Harry Potter.  Twilight.  The Hunger Games.

I've never read Harry Potter {Gasp} and I have no intentions to do so.

I read and liked Twilight although I think Bella is whiny, helpless, and sets the feminist movement back to B.C. times.

I loved, loved The Hunger Games but even though I found Katniss to be a strong, caring lead, I didn't totally love her character.  She was harsh and cold and didn't have an ounce of humor in her.

Right after I read The Hunger Games I read The Great and Terrible Beauty series by Libba Bray.  Ever since, I've been wanting to read them again.  The books are Victorian Gothic/paranormal which sounds odd but let me tell you, it's compelling. You aren't quite sure what you are gonna get.

And the lead.  Oh the lead.  Gemma Doyle is a great mix of Bella and Katniss.  She is brave, strong headed, and selfless like Katniss.  She is silly and dramatic like Bella.  But unlike both, Gemma seems really ... real.  She struggles with life--with thoughts of not being enough, with girl drama, with boy drama, with family drama but through it all, she is hilarious.  She thinks these sarcastic thoughts and is utterly delightful.

Anyhow, if you are looking for a new series to dive into, I'd suggest The Gemma Doyle Trilogy (I've suggested this to friends.  2 loved it, 1 thought it was so-so.  Although I will say one of the gals loved Gemma so much she contemplated naming her daughter after her ...).

This photo does not belong to me.  I stole it from Wikipedia but don't read Wikipedia and ruin the book!

P.S. Although I TOTALLY think this should be a movie, and IMBD thinks it might become one in 2015, right now, it's looking doubtful.  Rats.

What I Think About: Nookie Lights

I did it all for the nookie, c'mon 
The nookie, c'mon 
So you can take that cookie 
And stick it up your yeah! 
Stick it up your yeah! 
Stick it up your yeah! 
Stick it up your

Anyone remember this dreadful Limp Bizkit song?  Seriously.  Blech.

BUT, I will say this, I'm a fan of the Nookie Light.

What's this, you ask?  Let me tell you.

Well, let me tell you a hypothetical.  Husband wants a little lovin.  Wife has had enough kids loving on her and wants to sleep.  She says, "not tonight dear."  Dear gets upset and says, "You never initiate sex.  You never seem to desire me."  Wife rolls over and consents to begrudgingly have sex but neither partner wants it now.  

You see, some couples fight about sex.  Between headaches and long days and kids and Aunt Flo and unmatched libidos, some couples just can't quite get it together, sexually speaking.  And so fights about sex are common.

The Nookie Light is one of many solutions.  Essentially, you put a light (or candle) in your bedroom.  When one partner is feeling it, s/he lights/turns on the light/candle.  This is a way of indicating BOTH interest and a willingness to make a move.  Now, if the other partner is interested (or at least willing), s/he leaves the light on.  If the other partner is NOT interested, s/he turns the light off/blows out the candle.  

In the event the Nookie Light gets turned OFF, there are two rules that CANNOT be broken: 1.  There is no questioning WHY the light was turned off.  2. Whoever turned the light off commits to turning the light ON within the next week.

The whole point of the nookie light is to help couples who fight about sex communicate desire and interest without actually communicating (because even when it is said in love, "not tonight" sounds pretty harsh.).  Now, is one partner sometimes still getting a "no?"  Yeah, sometimes.  But "seeing" no and "hearing" no sometimes cause two different reactions.  PLUS, the "no" comes with a promise to pursue in a week so there's a silver lining in the disappointment.

What I think is Nookie Lights will never be a substitute for open communication but if you and your partner need a little help communicating, then I'm all for the Nookie Light!

Thanks, Shell for letting me Pour My Heart Out on your blog.
 

Days of Play: Memory

A couple of years ago at MOPs, a group of little kindergardeners came in and performed their version of the ABCs.  Rather than just doing the traditional song, the kids recited a verse for each letter they learned of the alphabet.

I was blown away.  Here were little 5 year olds with more verses memorized than I know!  Momentarily I was convinced I needed to send my children to the school that these kids went to.  But then I remembered that educating my children in the way of the Lord is MY part of my commission.

So, I did some internet searching on ABC verses and found some of my favorites and here is a list I came up with.

A

All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. Romans 3:23

B

Be still and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

C

Come to me all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest. Matt.11:28

D

Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart. Ps:37:4

E

Encourage one another, while it is still Today. Heb. 3:13

F

"For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11

G

"God is our refuge and strength, an ever present help in trouble." Psalm 46:1

H

"Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will never pass away." Matt.24:35

I

"I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except thru Me." John 14:6

J

Jesus Christ, the same yesterday, today and forever. Hebrews 13:8

K

"Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up. 1 Cor. 8:1

L

"Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength." Deuteronomy 6:5

M

"Make music in your heart to the Lord...always giving thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord, Jesus Christ." Ephesians 5:19

N

"No eye has seen, nor ear heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love Him." 1 Cor 2:9

O

O, God, you are my God: early will I seek you, for my soul thirsts for you. 
--- Psalm 63:1

P

"Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27

Q

Quench not the spirit; … hold fast what is good. 
--- 1 Thessalonians 5:19-21

R

"Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for Him." Psalm 37:7

S

"Surely, I am with you always." Matthew 28:20

T

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding in all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight." Proverbs 3:5-6

U

Understanding is a fountain of life to those who have it. Proverbs 16:22

V

Verily, verily, I say to you, He that 
believes in me has everlasting life.
--- John 6:47

W

"Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord." Psalm 27:14

X

eXcept a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.  John 3:3

Y

Your love, O LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies. Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, your justice like the great deep.  Psalm 36:5-6

Z

"....Zion, do not let your hands hang limp. The Lord, your God, is with you, he is mighty to save." Zephaniah 3:16, 17

I know that my children might not totally understand what they are memorizing (I feel this way about multiplication tables), but one day they will and these verses of hope, love, and encouragement will be burned on their hearts.

Music Monday: Neon Trees

What I love most about Neon Trees is their late-80s electronica pop sound.  What I like least about Neon Trees is ... um.  Well, I haven't decided.

Their new album comes out today and I'm excited to give it a listen.  I've already purchased Everyone Talks and it's awesomeness.

Animal--Probably their most famous tune





 Everybody Talks (this video cracks me up!)


 



 Sins of My Youth

 

Things I Love: Pumpkin in Spring

I found this recipe at The Frugally Rich Life a year and a half ago.

I tried it once and fell in love.

Then I decided to tweak it--a bit.

Okay, all I did was substitute natural, unsweetened applesauce for the oil.  Wa La!  Sugar free (well, except for the chocolate chips), oil free, healthy pumpki chocolate chip muffins.

Source: The Frugally Rich Life

Here's the slightly altered muffin recipe.

1 egg
1/2 c. honey
1/2 c. pureed pumpkin (fresh or canned)
1/2 c. milk (any percent but skim is best)
1/4 c. natural, unsweetened applesauce (or oil)
1 1/2 c. whole wheat flour (use white if you must)
2 t. baking powder
1/2 t. salt
1 t cinnamon
1 c. dark chocolate chips (or semi-sweet)

Stir together first five, wet ingredients. Add in next five dry ingredients. Stir until just mixed. Put in greased muffin tins. Bake 375 for 18 minutes.

Makes 12 regular sized muffins OR 36 mini-muffins.

FYI--You can fill the tins pretty full since these do not rise much.

What I Think About: Walking the Walk

Have you heard this verse before?

"but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint" (Isaiah 40:31).

I once learned that in Hebrew poetry, the last statement was generally the most important, the most relevant, the most consistent, the most powerful.   

Isn't that true here?

I mean some days I feel like I am soaring.
Some days I feel like I can run without tiring.
But most days I feel like a success if I just persevere through the day.

Do you ever feel like this?

It makes me feel kind of guilty--like where is my joy in the Lord?

You have to watch the following clip because I think it obliterates the lies of this world about success and pride all the while sharing in a tremendously relevant way, why The Walking is the most important part of our lives.



Did you get a bit teary-eyed?

I love sports films--Rudy, Sea Biscuit, Hoosiers, Invincible--because they are so inspirational.  And this clip is no exception.

I watched it and thought--this is what a relationship with God is like.  This is it!

The runner wasn't guaranteed worldly success (a gold medal) because he had a father--and neither are we.

The runner didn't avoid pain because he had a father--and neither will we.

Even in his father's presence, there was pain, agony, shame, despair, disappointment, brokenness, and humility--and so there will be for us as well.

On the bright side, the runner's father was there.  He was watching.  They couldn't keep him away in his son's time of need.  Just like God.

The father would have loved his son if he quit.  And God will love us if we quit, too.

The father walked with the son when the son wouldn't quit.  And God will walk with us, too.

The runner didn't get traditional worldly glory.
There was no gold waiting at the finish line.
There would be no Nike commercials featuring his face.
Though he finished to a standing ovation, the only thing that really waited for him was a stretcher, a time of painful healing, and a lifetime of "what ifs."

Now, however, who can remember the name of the gold medalist?  Was God not given more glory by persistently finishing the race in pain than winning a medal?

Sometimes we are under the perception that a relationship with God makes life easy.  That with Him there is wealth, health, and happiness. 

But look at this truth. Sometimes we will soar. Sometimes we will run without tiring.  Most of the time we will walk.

We will walk through pain.
We will walk through brokeness.
We will walk through lonliness.
We will walk through shame.
We will walk through guilt.
We will walk through blame.
We will walk through feelings of inadequacies.
We will walk through anger.
We will walk through doubt.

In the end it isn't about whether the race was short or long, easy or difficult.  It's about whether we finish.  And it doesn't matter if we finish soaring, running, walking, or carried in the arms of Our Father.  It matters that we finish.

And that's what I think about Walking the Walk.

Days of Play--Spaghetti Monsters {Repost}

Tactile play is an amazing way to help your children explore and learn.  In this day of play, take 1/4 box of spaghetti noodles and cook them according to directions.  Drain and **cool** them.

Put the cooled noodles in a big bowl and let your kids squish around in them.

For Younger Children:

This is perfectly acceptable for little ones but you will need to watch for noodle pieces heading toward the mouth.

For Older Kids:

Give each child their own bowl.  Have them wash their hands.  Add pasta sauce and an art smock.  Presto! Lunch you can play with!

Music Monday: FML

If you came here this morning expecting yet another post introducing you to some awesome band you've never heard of, I'm sorry. I'll return to my regular scheduled posts next week.

Right now I'm having an FML time of life. You know what that means, I presume. That means last week: I put my cat of 17 years to sleep and found out my dad's cancer is back. Not exactly the best time of life right now. 

So anyhow, enjoy some old music posts.


 Avett Brothers So first up, I and Love and You. A classic. I love it. Makes me happy.



Band of Horses

 


 The Epilogues Hunting Season



Barring any deals, hideous diseases, car accidents, or natural disasters, I'll be back next week.

What I Think About: Crying in My Cornbread

There's no use crying over spilt milk.

There's no use crying over spilt perfume.

Is there a use for crying in your cornbread?

Last week we had a cold spell (in Wyoming?  Shocking ...) so I decided to whip up a batch of veggie chili and cornbread.

Here is where the story gets long.  See my mom used to make this killer cornbread.  It was sweet and cake-like and incredibly moist.  I had the recipe--flour, cornmeal, eggs, oil, sour cream, honey (did I mention it was delicious and that almost always means UNHEALTHY?).

Unfortunately about 5 years ago I decided that Krustez cornbread mix was every bit as good as my mom's recipe (one of the few times I've been wrong) and so much easier.  Let's face it, it takes a long time to measure a cup of flour.  Or maybe I'm just lazy.

Anyhow, lately I've just gotten really cheap healthy so I wanted to make more stuff from scratch and less stuff from a box.  Flash forward to the chilly day and veggie chili in need of cornbread.

I go to the recipe box and look under "breads and muffins."  It's not there.  It wasn't under appetizers, beef, poultry, fish, brunch, soups, salads ... it was no where.  The recipe is gone.  Gone as in I looked at every recipe in my recipe box for an hour gone.  Gone.

I was a bit choked up but I put on my big girl panties, googled a recipe, and whipped up a batch of cornbread.  As I stirred the mixture together it happened.  Big, fat crocodile tears started running down my face and into my cornbread ingredients.

Because it was my mom's recipe.

Because it was written in her handwriting.

Because I can't ask her to write it down for me again.

It was this hideous reminder--days before Easter--that she is gone and that I'll never taste her cornbread again.

What I think is that sometimes something as small as a missing recipe makes her death real again.  It shocks me like a bucket of ice water over my head--drenching my strength, leaving me gulping for air, and fighting back tears. As I stood there crying in my cornbread, I was reminded that grief is a long process.

I miss my mom's cornbread but really, I just miss my mom.


Thanks, Shell for letting me Pour My Heart Out (into my cornbread) on your blog.
 

Days of Play: Money Jar

My daughter is learning about money in school and her progress report indicated she needed a bit more work in identifying coins by name and amounts.

So, being the good mom that I am, we played a game called "money jar."

To play, you need a money jar (with coins in it.  I know in this economy your money jar might be empty. I'm sorry), and a flat surface.

Dump all the coins onto your table and have your child sort the coins by size/shape.  Once the coins are in their right groups, go over the names and amounts.  M was having hard time with dimes.  Luckily she knows very rudimentary Spanish so I said, "what is ten in Spanish?"  She said, "Diez."  I said, "how much is this one (pointing to the dime) worth?" She said, "ten" to which I replied, that's right.  A dime has ten like diez is ten.  Dime Diez.  Dime Diez.

She totally gets dime now.

If you want to make this more difficult, pick a coin (for instance, a quarter) and have your child pick another stack of coins that equal that amount (5 nickels, 25 pennies, 2 dimes and 1 nickel).  M thought it was fun to group pennies in 10s and then "trade up" a stack of pennies for a dime or two nickels.

Now if you are feeling particularly adventurous, you could separate the coins into dollar stacks and take your kiddos for a treat; let your children pay in coins (use the quarters first--trust me).

Music Monday: The xx

English Indie Pop.

Seriously, that's all I should have to say and you should be all, "ohh, fun."

The xx is actually an older band (from clear back in 2005!) and if you listen to Rihanna (like my husband does.  Vomit), then you've probably heard some of their music playing in the background.  I've had The xx album on our iTunes for over a year but somehow Matt just heard it.  He thinks the sound is perfect for massage/sexy time.  He's wondering where this band has been all his life.  Well, maybe not but he does like them.

Do you?

Heart Skipped a Beat (my fave!)





 Crystalized (probably their most famous)

 


 Islands (fun and poppy and hey, I want to be on an island)

 

Date Night {IN}: Sassy Egg Hunt (for him!)

Has anyone caught onto the fact that I love anything bright. flashy, sparkly, or that glows-in-the-dark?

If I were a fish I'd be a goner!  Ha!

Anyhow I'm cruising through Pinterest (another shocker.  I know) and I saw this photo:

Source: mommysavers.com via Reagan on Pinterest

Next thing I know those glow-in-the-dark eggs prompted a mental-leap to a sexy-themed egg hunt for the hot husband. I love it when that happens. I think he does too.

 Basically this date is easy-peasy and can be a PG or X-Rated as you want.

What you will need:

• Eggs (big ones) 
• glow in the dark necklaces/bracelets (Target has these in the $1 bin) 
• Stuff to put in eggs (see the caveat below) 

 What to do:

• Send your husband a text/e-mail telling him that he has a special surprise just because he makes your heart glow. 
• While he isn't around, crack the glow-sticks and bend them so one fits in each egg. Stuff the egg with other goodies. 
• Hide them. 
• When it is time, send your honey on an egg hunt. 

 The end.

 Or NOT.

 Here's what I really suggest. Don't just give your husband candy. Fill the eggs with a mix of candy, spiciness, and sassy activities. For examples, put a new pair of tiny (and I mean tiny) panties in one egg with a promise to wear only the panties to bed. In another egg tell him that you are going to kiss for one minute. In another egg have a note good for 5 minutes of you tickling his back with your hair. You could also include: massage oil, a certificate for a 10 minute back rub, a $10 iTunes card .... you get the picture.

Things I Love: Cookies that Teach about Jesus

This is an excellent recipe to teach your children that Jesus rose from the dead!  I cut this recipe out of a Christian book club magazine years ago and love it.  Sadly I can't eat the cookies because of a nut allergy but everyone else seems to like them!


Ingredients:
1 cup whole pecans
1 teaspoon vinegar
3 egg whites
a pinch salt
1 cup sugar
a zipper baggy
1 wooden spoon or rolling pin
scotch tape
Bible

Directions:
Make these on the night before Easter!

Preheat oven to 300'.

1. Place pecans in zipper baggy and let children beat them with the wooden spoon or rolling pin.  As children break pecans into small pieces, explain that after Jesus was arrested.  He was beaten by the Roman soldiers.  Read: John 19:1-3
2. Let each child smell the vinegar.  Put 1 teaspoon vinegar into mixing bowl. Explain that when Jesus was thirsty on the cross He was given vinegar to drink. Read: John 19:28-30
3. Add egg whites to vinegar.  Eggs represent life.  Explain that Jesus gave His life to give us life. Read: John 10:10&11
4. Sprinkle a little salt into each child's hand.  Let them taste it and brush the rest into the bowl.  Explain that this represents the salty tears shed by Jesus' followers, and the bitterness of our own sin. Read: Luke 23:27
5. So far the ingredients are not very appetizing.  Add 1 cup sugar.  Explain that the sweetest part of the story is that Jesus died because He loves us.  He wants us tocknow and belong to Him. Read:  Psalm 34:8 and John 3:16
6. Beat with a mixer on high speed for 12 to 15 minutes until stiff peaks are formed. 
7. Explain that the color white represents the purity in God's eyes of those whose sins have been cleansed by Jesus. Read: Isaiah 1:18 and John 3:1-3
8. Fold in broken nuts.  Drop by teaspoon onto waxed paper covered cookie sheet.
9. Explain that each mound represents the rocky tomb where Jesus' body was laid.  Read: Matthew 27:57-60
10. Put the cookie sheet in the oven, close the door and turn the oven OFF.
11. Give each child a piece of tape and seal the oven door.  Explain that Jesus' tomb was sealed. Read: Matthew 27:65-66
12. GO TO BED!  While you tuck your kiddos in, explain that they may feel sad to leave the cookies in the oven overnight just like Jesus' followers were sad when he died. Read: John 16:20&22
13. On Easter morning, open the oven and give everyone a cookie (for breakfast!  You'll be super mom for allowing a cookie for breakfast!).  Notice the cracked surface and take a bite.  The cookies are hollow!  On the first Easter Jesus' followers were amazed to find the tomb open and empty. Read: Matthew 28:1-9
14. Turn on praise music or sing a song of praise to Jesus.  
15. Say a prayer with your kids thanking God for sending his Son to redeem the world!

What I Think About: Lessons from Children

When I think of all the "parenting rules" out there, I get pretty distraught.  I mean, I'm no where close to being super mom.

Exhibit #1--A few days ago Paxton was playing near the garbage can and emerged minutes later eating something ... bad parenting?  Nope.  I called it "morning snack."

Exhibit #2--Everyone is always saying how fun bath time is.  Know what?  I can't stand it.  Water everywhere, cleaning potty out of the water, ring around the tub ... not my idea of a good time.

While I might not be in line for an award, and I'm most definitely not licensed to give mothering advice, this mom says you can learn a lot from your little ones.

The Top Five Lessons I've Learned from My Children

1.  Sweat the Small Stuff

Did you ever notice that we aren't supposed to "sweat the small stuff" but "it's the little things that count"?  Does that seem ironic to anyone else?

To me, parents sweat the big stuff (jobs, electrical bills) but we ignore the little stuff when shouldn't it be the other way around (okay, I'm not telling you to NOT pay your electric bill but you know what I mean--right)?

My kids have done an amazing job of making me focus on what really matters--finding beauty in a butterfly, reading a good book over and over (and over), eating cookies in bed without worrying about crumbs until later.

2.  It's better to be together than to have it together

There is a huge social stigma with being a stay-at-home-mom.  I mean, since I have all this "extra" time on my hands, I better put it to good use.  So I Once a Month Cook, and buy cute clothing, and organize, and volunteer ... all to make it look like I've got it all together. 

But sometimes when I'm dusting it dawns on me I haven't laughed with my kids.  Or when I'm vacuuming that I haven't read them a story.  Or when we are running errands I'll realize it's been forever since we've gone to the park.

See my kids don't care if the house is a wreck or if I've showered or if their closets are organized by color and season and short to long sleeves.  They don't care if I've got it together.  They care that we are together.  Thank you, Pax and M.E. for reminding me that "we may not have it all together, but together we have it all!"

3.  It's okay to have BIG faith.


I was praying with my daughter the other day and she asked God to make her a chipmunk with real fish in her tummy.  I almost laughed out loud told her that might not happen but then I thought about my motivations for doing so.

If I want her to believe that God is mighty and awesome--shouldn't I?

Okay, so it isn't likely that she'll be a chipmunk but is it more important for her to have faith that God can change her if He wants to or that she be brought back to reality?

When I thought about the miracles I've seen, none of them have made sense to me.  None of them.  What a faith-based, power packed punch that prayer was.  Amazing how a child can teach you Biblical truths.

4.  You can get a lot of mileage out of a pair of good shoes.


I bought M.E. a pair of princess cowboy boots that light up.  She wore them for about a year solid.

She wears them with jeans and skirts and dresses and PJs.  She plays dolls, helps her dad with construction work, and climbs jungle gyms with them on.

Sometimes I want to scrimp and get cheap-o shoes but this lesson is well taken.  Spending some extra dough on the right pair of comfy, versatile shoes is the smart way to go.  Even if they don't light up.


5.  When all else fails, smile.

Whenver Paxton wants something he does this ear-drum breaking scream and when I look at him in horror, he gives me this darling smile and I melt into a puddle of goo and hand him whatever was worth screaming/smiling about.

When M.E. is scared she'll smile and do a nervous laugh.

The other day my kids were driving me nuts.  Nuts as in: Paxton spilled a whole container of Cherrios on the floor, M.E. spilled bubbles all over her table and tea set, and the police showed up at my door because someone called 911 "for fun."

I nearly blew my top (but you can't do that in front of the police, though I did consider begging them to take me to jail for a time out).  So I smiled.  And when the police were gone, I laughed.  Because these moments were memory makers.  Sure I could have gotten angry and lectured and dolled out time-outs but instead, I turned bad events into teachable moments.  And that's something to smile about

When it comes to parenting, I'm not perfect.  I don't have it all together.  But what I've learned is that I have a lot to learn ... from my children. I love participating in Shell's PYHO on Wednesdays!

 

Days of Play: Easter Stuff

We don't do anything Easter Bunny-ish but we sure do love a good egg hunt.  So this week while my daughter is home on Spring Break (yay!) we are going to try a few new crafts.

First up (and the one I'm most excited for.  Bring on the mess!) is Shaving Cream Painting.

Photo from Little Wonders' Days.

All you need is shaving cream, paints, card stock "eggs", a squeegee and a willingness to play!

I found this on Pinterest!  Please go to the blog Little Wonders' Days (<--click that link) for directions.

Next on our list is egg dying.  I've heard you can do this with Kool-Aid but I'm sticking with my good ol' reliable food coloring and vinegar.  I might try this though.  I saw this photo and thought ... duh!

Photo from Parent Hacks

Oh, and for dyeing, I'm excited to try this rubber band method from Inkspired Musings.

Photo from Inkspired Musings

Anyone have some awesome Easter-themed crafts they are working on this week?

Music Monday: Bad Books

In general, I really hate bad books.  The Scarlet Letter?  Vomit.  The Red Badge of Courage? Skip it.  Moby Dick?  I don't care how many people call it a classic, I still think it sucks *bleeeeeep*.

Lucky for you, I'm not asking your to reminisce the horrible books you've read.  Where bad books, literature wise, are frustrating, The Bad Books-musically speaking--are an incredible American Indie band formed in 2010.  This band has a similar sound to Manchester Orchestra (have I introduced them to you yet?  Hmmm.... anyhoo, the lead of Manchester Orchestra is in Bad Books so it makes sense that the style is similar), Bon Iver, and The Airborne Toxic Event.  Really their music is Folk/Americana/Melodramatic.

If you want to check out some free music, head to The Bad Books' MySpace page (because MySpace still exists ...).

Or hear them here (and if you like them, go buy their tunes on iTunes).

You Wouldn't Have to Ask




 I Begged You Everything

 

I'm Not Ready to Forgive You

 

What I Thing About: Hearts

Former Vice President Dick Cheney just got a heart transplant.  At 71.

Now the guy is from Wyoming and when anyone from Wyoming makes it big time it's a big deal.  I mean, we're the least populated state--we've gotta have each other's back.  Do I love all of his decisions?  Nope.  Do I wish him harm?  Nope.

If you've read a paper (or online news source) in say the last 11 years then you probably know Cheney has had some heart issues and has been hospitalized on one occasion or another for heart problems.  His heart was failing.  Some gracious donor died (but keeps living--be a donor!) and that person's heart went to Cheney.

Now people are saying that "giving" the heart to Cheney was morally problematic because of his age.

I'm sorry.  Come again.

At what age do humans stop being humans deserving of compassion and life?

Don't get me wrong, I can understand the viewpoint.  Perhaps the heart should have gone to some strapping 32 year old dad.  Maybe that does make sense.  But for Cheney's family, I'm guessing giving their dad/husband a new heart at 71 makes sense too.  Now he can enjoy his life and his kids' lives.

I've seen the data.  I know there are over 3,000 people waiting for hearts.  I know 300 die every year waiting.  I've also seen how not everyone on that list is a tissue match so even if there was a 32 year old dad out there who needed that heart, it might be possible that his tissue did not match that of the donor.

I'm deeply disturbed by the lack of respect for life--at any age--demonstrated by the "he's too old to give a heart to" mentality.  What is it in our American culture that allows us to be so callous toward our elders?  Shouldn't we be respectful and hold them in esteem?

When I hear these arguments I can't help but think--what next?  I mean, maybe we should just institute a "no medical support" policy after 65.  Think how much money we'd save on Medicare if we weren't doing open heart surgeries, chemotherapy, hip replacements, etc., on people of retirement age.  That's it.  I'm starting a lobby for an automatic DO NOT RESUSCITATE law for people 65 and older.

Because those folks have nothing to give.

Nobody loves them.

They didn't serve their country or their families or make contributions.  Or maybe they did but now that they are old, they don't deserve anything because they are just wasting away, sucking up perfectly good air and resources that should be used on the young.

Want to know what's ironic here?  There was someone famous who held this exact same viewpoint on the aged and the disabled.  We refer to him as Hitler.

Life is precious.  It is precious at 7.  It is precious at 17.  It is precious at 37, 57, 71, and 97.  Life matters and we all have a right to keep living.

There is no age where medical intervention is morally unethical.  The only moral problem I see here is with people who value their elders so little that they'd suggest someone is "too old" to take proper measures to keep on living.

What I think is those people who think Cheney was too old for his new heart must clearly have first hand experience on what it's like to live without one.  I'd suggest they give lessons on how to be heartless but I don't want such insensitivity spreading.


I love participating in Shell's PYHO on Wednesdays!

 

Days of Play: Magic Numbers

I've been doing lots of math posts lately.  I'm not sure if this is to help my daughter with her math skills or if it is to help me brush up on my math skills before she starts to learn about fractions (which, by the way, happens before 2nd grade here.   What?!).

When I was a kid we played car games.  I know what you are thinking--we played car games because we didn't have dvd players in the car.  But you are wrong. My mom had this plush conversion van with a TV in it, captains seats, a bed in the back ... of course we moved about the van freely because in the early 80s no one cared about seat belts.  Seat belts, sheet belts ... psh.  One time, that TV fell out of its place and landed on my chest.  This might be why I need a boob job ...

Okay, car games.  Anyhow, today's intentional play is perfect for the car AND can be used with older and younger kids.

To play, pick a number any number.  That number is your "magic" number.  Now, give your child(ren) a clue.  "My magic number is between 1-10."  Let them guess.  If the guess is right, it is your kiddo's turn.  If the guess is wrong, give another clue.  "My number is even." Repeat process.

For little kids (like my nearly 3 year old), you can keep this simple, "My magic number is between 1 and three."

For older kids make it a bit more challenging: My number is a prime number.  My number is greater than 17 but less than 34.  My number is a multiple of 2.  My number is divisible by 9.  You catch my drift.

Have fun playing magic numbers :)