Wednesday, April 25, 2012

What I Think About: Nookie Lights

I did it all for the nookie, c'mon 
The nookie, c'mon 
So you can take that cookie 
And stick it up your yeah! 
Stick it up your yeah! 
Stick it up your yeah! 
Stick it up your

Anyone remember this dreadful Limp Bizkit song?  Seriously.  Blech.

BUT, I will say this, I'm a fan of the Nookie Light.

What's this, you ask?  Let me tell you.

Well, let me tell you a hypothetical.  Husband wants a little lovin.  Wife has had enough kids loving on her and wants to sleep.  She says, "not tonight dear."  Dear gets upset and says, "You never initiate sex.  You never seem to desire me."  Wife rolls over and consents to begrudgingly have sex but neither partner wants it now.  

You see, some couples fight about sex.  Between headaches and long days and kids and Aunt Flo and unmatched libidos, some couples just can't quite get it together, sexually speaking.  And so fights about sex are common.

The Nookie Light is one of many solutions.  Essentially, you put a light (or candle) in your bedroom.  When one partner is feeling it, s/he lights/turns on the light/candle.  This is a way of indicating BOTH interest and a willingness to make a move.  Now, if the other partner is interested (or at least willing), s/he leaves the light on.  If the other partner is NOT interested, s/he turns the light off/blows out the candle.  

In the event the Nookie Light gets turned OFF, there are two rules that CANNOT be broken: 1.  There is no questioning WHY the light was turned off.  2. Whoever turned the light off commits to turning the light ON within the next week.

The whole point of the nookie light is to help couples who fight about sex communicate desire and interest without actually communicating (because even when it is said in love, "not tonight" sounds pretty harsh.).  Now, is one partner sometimes still getting a "no?"  Yeah, sometimes.  But "seeing" no and "hearing" no sometimes cause two different reactions.  PLUS, the "no" comes with a promise to pursue in a week so there's a silver lining in the disappointment.

What I think is Nookie Lights will never be a substitute for open communication but if you and your partner need a little help communicating, then I'm all for the Nookie Light!

Thanks, Shell for letting me Pour My Heart Out on your blog.


  1. Candle or no candle....let's just get it on...

  2. Oh, I like this idea! Not too much discussion needed. :)

  3. That's a good idea!! I will remember this!


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