Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Cutting It Off!

When I was a kid my parents and I had huge control issues over my hair.  Really, the fights were epic.  I like my straight hair long, free, and in my face.  They hated it.  They wanted me to tease my bangs and wear French braids like my sister; I refused. 

The result: years of pixie cuts.

You've seen my photos.  My round face in a pixie cut is NOT cute. 

Basically what I'm saying is that until I "took my hair" back in seventh grade, I hated my hair.  And I promised I would NEVER get into control issues about hair with my kids.  Short?  Fine.  Purple?  No problem.  Mohawk?  Whatever floats your boat.

The past few months M.E. has wanted to cut her long, flowing, beautiful hair.  I've been resisting.  Are you sure?  Are you sure?  Are you sure?  I'm pretty sure M.E. is tried of hearing that question! 

I kept thinking she wasn't old enough to make that kind of decision--that I needed to be the protector of her hair.

What I realized is that we were having control issues over her hair.  It is true that I can't put the hair back on once she cuts it off but it is equally true that it will grow again.  And it is true that she is a lovely, delightful little girl no matter what her hair looks like. 

I want M.E. to know that who she is on the inside matters more than what her hair looks like on the outside.

I want M.E. to know that I trust her to make decisions (and to live with the consequences).

I want M.E. to know that who she is is all right with me (even if I think she needs a tweak here and there). 

So on Saturday, M.E. cut off ten inches of perfectly healthy beautiful hair.  She loves that it is short and doesn't get into so many tangles.  She hasn't mentioned once that it was a mistake.  And even though I wanted her hair long, I'm diggin' her new look!

You know what is really ironic about this whole situation?  I'm NOT emotional about my hair.  It has been long, short, platinum, black, brown, red, orange, straight, permed, flipped, teased, ironed and mayonnaises. 

I hereby resolve to hold on to my original plan: when it comes to my kids' hair, what they want is fine with me!


  1. She looks adorable! Probably easier for you to brush as well!

  2. oh it does look great.. but girl I have to say that if my Madison decides to cut her hair off I'll cry. Not where she can see me.. but I will.

    I have no emotional attachment to my own hair.. but to hers? lol I'm with you though.. it's HER hair.. and kids should be able to take pride in themselves

  3. Her hair looks great!
    I wasn't ever allowed to have my hair cut (only trimmed) I was so jealous of all my friends who had the cute bobs, and the nice layers...in the end it resulted in me cutting my own hair and pretending that I was trying to cut out a piece of hair stuck in my ponytail...not sure how believable that one was..haha

  4. I agree. In my house the rule is, "Hair grows back. Do with it what you will."

    P.S. I have an award for you at my blog! http://www.nounsandviolets.com/2011/01/and-the-award-goes-to/

  5. Natasha's comment made me laugh because when I was 13, my mom LOVED my super long hair and refused to cut it to shoulder length (what I wanted - my hair was down to my waist). So I took matters into my hands and every three months or so would trim my hair 1-2" shorter. Then, after doing that two or three times, I declared that my hair was all ragged and needed a trim badly. And I begged my dad to do it because I remembered one time when he cut my Mom's hair wayyyy shorter than she wanted him to. So he did. And, in true Dad fashion, it took him going back and forth so many times to get it straight that I ended up with shoulder length hair.

    My mom was distraught. I was thrilled. :)


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